Mary, London

Mary is an actress, office manager, and Kardashian devotee.

What makes you happy?

Knowing everyone is fine. The worst feeling in the world is knowing something isn’t right; whether that is someone’s health or something weird in your relationship with them. There is no better feeling of happiness knowing everyone is fine and all I have to think about is what to watch on the telly.

Is there something that you spent a long time believing you couldn’t do…. only to try it and realise that you can actually could do it? What made you try it?

Oh god – everything in my life! I didn’t think I could do university when I got there. I wanted to quit after the first week. I was too scared to talk to anyone, it felt like everyone already had friends. It felt like everyone was smarter than me, read more books than I had, knew themselves better, knew what they wanted to do, where they wanted to be. 

I had to stay there because I knew I needed a degree from Uni to do anything. I didn’t want to let my parents down – they didn’t go to university and put a huge amount of stock in education. All my siblings went to University and have degrees (they all have more than one actually – I am the least educated!) 

I realised I could do it when I was getting better grades with less work than those around me. I realised that it didn’t matter how many ‘important’ books and films you had seen. It mattered that you understood the subject and I understand history and I write well so my essays were bangin’.

If you were taking yourself on a date, what would you arrange for yourself?

night out! Dinner and a play and some drinks. Not that unique but I would love it! Also if we got cabs. I always feel so fancy in a cab!

What’s one thing you do regularly in order to look after yourself?

Hot yoga. But it often gets bumped out of my schedule, until it gets to the stage where I find it hard to sleep from jaw clenching and over-thinking every moment of my day and wondering how what I said or did, portrayed me. Or if it betrayed me, more to the point.

Share one thing that used to make you really anxious, that you no longer worry about.

My weight. It used to always be at the back somewhere. It drove many fits of enormous focus on it and some success in getting rid of it. I only cared because I thought everyone else did. Then when I realised nobody else really did, I decided to see what they saw.

Time is precious. What do you dedicate yours to? 

People. It is the only point I see for us being here.

Give your 18 year old self one piece of advice. 

You’re not behind, you’re different. You’ll never be the person that knows exactly what they are doing and that’s grand.

How will you grow old, gracefully or disgracefully?

Disgracefully. I have no time for being a certain way because of my age. If I end up acting old or acting my age, its natural, not imposed. I don’t think I’ll ever feel my age so I’m just gonna do whatever I feel.

What do you hope people say about you when you eventually leave this mortal coil?

That I made things a bit more fun and helped them enjoy life a bit more.

How did answering these questions make you feel?

Like I have more figured out than I thought and that I’m happy with that. I really feel like I’m not supposed to figure it out and that gives my head a rest.

Check out more happiness including workshops, talks, podcasts and care packages at www.happyhumanbean.com